You'd think it was reasonable to think that after one spends the last couple of months writing somewhere in the league of 35 letters, that there would be an expectation that one would get some in return. However, it seems that is just wishful thinking...

I would like to thank Shuri & Aya for stepping up to the plate though. It's nice not to get just bills & unsolicited mail, don't you think?

On an up-note though, it is going to be another beautiful day!

Sometimes, a song says so much about how one is feeling. Today, this is mine:

Another constellation dies
Do what you want 'cause it's your own sky
Just call me when the phone stops ringing
Thanks for coming by
I'm just glad I'm on your good side
Where it's smoldering or freezing
It's never all that easy to decide

This is the land of a thousand words
But it seems so few are worth the breath to say
Except I'll be looking after my own world
And you just keep on saving the day
I'll try to stay but it's in vain when you're far
I'm on the run to wherever you are

And that's the nature of the chase
You fall so far behind you end in first place
Pass the torch this time we're running to each's own regret
There's no harm in playing hard to get
Boundlessness deceives me
Baby you may turn the corner yet

This is the land of a thousand words
But it seems so few are worth the breath to say
Except I'll be looking after my own world
And you just keep on saving the day
I'll try to stay but it's in vain when you're far
I'm on the run to wherever you are

I'm a gonna do everything I say
Tried to stay but time's running out
But now I'm on my way

"Land of a Thousand Words" - Scissor Sisters

I went to see the film Children of Men yesterday and I must say that I am still feeling a little disturbed about it today.

In my mind, it started out about a world where the human race was not able to procreate but when I was actually watching it, it dealt with so many other issues. The plight of refugees and a future where they had no rights, discrimination, a world where there was no hope and even when presented with hope, a lack of value for human life and the beliefs of others. I couldn't think of one level of this film that was not disturbing.

In the back of my mind, I couldn't help but think that this world has already started to develop. We live in a world where intolerance seems prevalent, whether it be by colour of ones skin, faith and the country of one's origin. Where war is an overbearing presence to peace - if peace even exists at all. And, where scientists are fooling around with genetics and where drugs, pesticides, pollution control all seem to be done before we really know what the long term effects to the earth and to it's inhabitants.

Take for example what I read in a book entitled This is your Brain on Music, by Daniel J. Levitin. While discussing neurotransmitters, there was a small section on anti-depressants like Prozac and Zoloft, which doesn't produce but instead slows the "reuptake" of serotonin allowing it to act for a longer period of time. Here is what Levitin has to say: "The precise mechanism by which this alleviates depression, obssessive-compulsive disorder, and mood and sleep disorders is not known." Is not known? Does this mean that they don't know all they can about the function before they start prescribing this drug to millions? Seems a little unsafe to me.

How many other drugs and chemicals are out there like this? Does anyone out there remember thalidomide? And, how can we be sure that they don't contribute to infertility?

Which brings me back to this film. Is it a prophetic look at the world of the not too distant future? Is it like Climate Change in that it might be too late to stop the downfall of societies into anarchy and hopelessness? Most importantly, does humanity have the desire and the capability to stop it?

Now, I'd just like to say that while I feel affected by the film, I also really liked it. I can't say enjoyed because it was a little dark for that but I would highly recommend it. It was - as you can tell by today's post - quite thought-provoking.

And, that can be a good thing...

Hey! Did you know that today is Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day? You'd better get popping!

What? None of the real stuff? Just play the game...

Perhaps I'm just too nosy but there are times when I become unwillingly pulled into other people's conversations. On some occasions, it wonderful because you can get to know someone new by getting involved in their conversations. However, there are those times when people have inane dialogues in really loud voices and you just want to smack them up-side the head.

Tonight, on the inter-city coach from my town to the big city, I was unfortunate enough to sit in front of a couple of people that needed to put a cork in it. The clencher was when the guy started talking about which girl would be a more suitable girlfriend for him. Not a big problem for some, but this guy was so obviously latently gay.

And the girl who was travelling with him was either totally oblivious or afraid to address the truth.

In hindsight, it was pretty amusing to listen to their banter because they were so clueless about a lot of things. However, one has to wonder why some people have to talk so loudly in an enclosed place. Even the guy in front of me was annoyed with them. Lucky for these two people that none of the other passengers were of a violent nature.

Note (added Jan.29): Interestingly enough, this same guy (minus his friend) was on the same bus coming back to Victoria on Saturday night. I got to see his girlfriend too... Poor girl.

On a brighter note, the sun came out today. It wasn't sweltering hot but it was good to see the brilliant orb, which is the sun, shining up in the sky. It's even supposed to be like this until next week.

My new music books came in today and so I picked them up. There's really no excuse to not get started now. Wish me luck.

It's amazing when one has friends that will listen to you. Even better when they know you almost as well as you know yourself and that are able to assist you in balancing your perspective. It's a gift, really.

There is not a day that goes by that I do not consider myself lucky to have such friends.

Last night, I met my friend and spilled my guts about what is making me happy and what was creating frustration and confusion in my life. This friend can listen and sum it all up in a matter of minutes - even though we haven't seen each other in a long time. I've now got an external "voice of reason". Not afraid to tell it from the best perspective, I truly am glad to be friends.

For months now, I've been pondering over my thoughts and have yet to come up with any concrete decisions. I've been floudering on a particular issue and after talking to my dear friend, have realized that I've been wasting my time. What I was looking for would most likely not be found in the direction that I've been heading and the sad truth is, I've got to start in a new one. As much as I don't really like change, I know that it is best just to change course and things will be much less complicated.

So, my tack is slowly changing and things look brighter already.

Does anyone else out there find the premise to Kanso restaurant in Osaka a little disturbing? Read about it here in an article for the Japan Times.

Hailed as "A dining experience best described as 'late '90s chic homeless-shelter'", this basically empty lot that serves uncooked food out of the tin is apparently the best thing since Spam (which, by the way is served there). In the winter months, it's enclosed with plastic sheeting during the colder months and in the summer, the bare lot is open to the air. It's an homage to homeless people all over the world.

I'm guessing, though, that you won't find any real homeless people patronizing the place as the prices aren't cheap.

My question is, what kind of people go there? Are they wannabe homeless people? And, if they are wannabes, why aren't they out on the street trying to survive there?

Homelessness is not an issue to make light of. It's a big problem everywhere and here we find someone cashing in on the plight of the lives of the more unfortunate people to make a quick bunch of yen. Ah, the almighty yen (dollar, euro, pound, peso, kroner, etc).

Now, if they were donating the profits to help the truly unfortunate, then that would be saying something...

I don't know why, but this kind of thing just irritates me. All I seem to see is companies making huge amounts of money and encouraging people to buy beyond their means. I see celebrities that go out and buy ridiculously expensive cars, clothes and homes not thinking about the wasteful examples that they give their fans. Kids who want it all because say P.Diddy (or whatever he calls himself now) or Justin Timberlake or Paris Hilton or Britney Spears have it. Shouldn't these rich people be setting a better example for the rest of the world? Or is it just because you have more money that you shouldn't really have to take responsibility for the examples they are setting. I'm just tired of it.

Average people could work the rest of their lives and not have the things that most of these celebrities have. Yet, they work and buy beyond their means with credit. Why? So that they can impress their neighbours?

Which brings me back to the restaurant. Perhaps it's the next step of evolution that we glamourize the lives of people who have nothing. A counter-reaction to the whole more, more, more lifestyle. Sadly, I don't think it is. It's just a trend to make money.

Money. The thing that seems to create the most trouble in the world...

I was thinking, over the weekend, about a strange experience I had on New Years Eve.

You see, I don't usually go out on that evening, except to maybe see a film however, this past year, I got an invite from my friend Mao to join her and her friends that evening. For whatever reason, I decided to throw caution to the wind and have a bit of celebration at the end of the year. We met late, and went to a local pub/restaurant and due to the "connections" of one of the group, we got in. As I expected, it was crowded and my senses went into overload (I don't usually like crowds because there is too much distraction). And while we had to wait to get a seat, they managed to sit our entire group in a very short time.

Being the very social people that they are, the people at our table were circulating - not only with each other but with other tables. I remember, when I was younger, having that kind of energy, however, this time, I sat and conversed with the people at the table as I didn't really know many of them well.

All of this, in itself, wasn't all that strange, I admit however, while there were a couple of empty chairs at the table, a lone male sits down for a few minutes. Not really knowing anyone, I thought this guy knew some of the other people sitting there. It wasn't until this same guy pulled something out of his pocket and poured lines of white powder onto the table and proceeded to snort it, that we all wondered aloud, whether anyone knew him. It turns out that no one did.

Now, in the small town of mine, I had never, ever experienced anything like this before. In fact, I am pretty much in denial that this happens at all. I don't usually encounter it in my circle of friends. In fact, I don't consume alcohol even. I did, however, find this a little amusing along with my shock that it had happened before my eyes.

How did this guy know that we weren't police or something. It was right out in the open for all to see.

I kind of wish I had handcuffs so that I could have scared the shit out of him.

After he left the table, the one of the guys there told the staff and this guy was escorted to the door.

For the life of me, I don't think I could remember what he looked like. To me, he just seemed like a dark shadow. One that just happened to sit at our table and snort drugs.

I also wanted to tell some of you that I have been a letter-writing maniac over the last couple of days. This means there are a few of you who will soon be receiving a letter from me over the next week or so. I won't ruin the surprise by telling you - let's hope that you'll enjoy my rediscovered joy of writing letters.

Interestingly enough, I had all sorts of things to say so I was really looking forward to this post earlier today. However, now that I have spent half the day travelling and a lot of that was done while stuffing my face with tasty morsels (okay, so if I must admit it, the size was much more than a couple of small bits of food), I am now full and feeling pretty lethargic. That pretty much means that my brain has kind of shut down.

I will attempt to perservere over that feeling like I just want to flop down on my friend's sofa and stay there until some room becomes available and I don't feel like an overstuffed exercise ball...

This morning, I finished a book entitled "The Quiet American" which had been lent to me by a friend. It's not a new work but I found it quite relevant in today's world. To me, the basic message is that we should not get involved in other people's problems, unless that is, they ask for it. We should not assume that all of the world wants to be a democracy or that the west has all of the answers. Hell, we don't even have the answers for our own problems. Why the hell should we expect that we know what's best for the rest of the world, then? To me, it seems like we have some sort of ulterior motives.

I remember once, around the time of Big Daddy Bush's Gulf war, seeing a bumper sticker that said something like, "If Kuwait's national resource was broccoli, would there be a Gulf War?" At the time, Bush Sr. had been quoted as saying that he hated that particular vegetable. Being that oil was the actual resource of that area of the world, and America was dependant on it, then we had all the right and reason to start a war a very long way from North American soil.

This post is not to be an anti-American rant, it's just providing an example of how people meddle in things that do not directly concern them, even though they can provide you with all sorts of false reasoning for doing so. Perhaps we have to know which battles are important and which should just be left well enough alone. And, yes, that's me included...

That said, I loved the book.

Not only for the writing, but also for the fact that there were many notes written among the text by the friend who owned the book. Originally from Iran, trapped for years in Spain during the revolution in her home country and eventually coming to live in Quebec, she is an inspiration. She has suffered all sorts of hardship and come out with an amazing life story. One that puts my trivial little troubles into perspective when I sit down and think of it. (I swear that one day, I will convince her to let me write her life story)

That's a whole different story. Back to the book that she lent me, the many notes were written in her first language, Farsi and her fourth language which was French. They were there to help her to understand a novel written in the time of the French occupation in Viet Nam. I read the text with great enthusiasm because I was enjoying the book, but I was also excited to read the notations that she included. I could read and understand some of the French, but I could not read the Persian language. It added so much more to the book. I thank her so much for lending me the book in the first place.

It's just in time, really, because the library called about the book that I have waited three months to get entitled "This is your brain on music" and I believe it discusses the influence that music has on our thought processes. I brought it with me and will read it between the letters that I very much owe my friends. (And the postal rates just went up again)

The book comes at an ideal time which sees me contemplating finishing my music education. Those of you who I've talked to about this know how excited I am about this. Music was a big part of my childhood as my parents very much wanted me to become a pianist. There are many reasons that I did not finish this education but mostly because of the cost of lessons (I had to start paying for them myself) and incidents/people that caused me to doubt in my ability at the time. Now that I understand that, I find myself ready to try again. It's never too late to learn something new.

So, literature, the artform of handwritten correspondence and music are filling my days. Good food is filling my stomach. And now, I am afraid, sleep is calling me...

It's funny. In a world that I often am amazed is so beautiful, there seems to be a lot of ugly lately. Maybe I've been affected by this neverending cold, but I cannot help feeling that the beauty that I often see has been overshadowed by ugliness.

On Saturday, I walked down to the local transit exchange to catch a bus and was surrounded by ugly youth. This particular group was standing around on the icy sidewalk talking at - and not to - each other, and just being generally annoying. The thing I noticed though is that these young people looked scruffy, some with brightly-coloured hair, and most had dark circles and puffiness under their eyes. It kind of looked like none of them had slept in days. Their skin was dull and their eyes lacked the shine that young people should have. After all, they have their whole lives ahead of them.

Unfortunately, I can't help feeling that these same young people have no inspiration to do anything but party. In fact, that's all they talked about while standing at this bus stop. Is this something to do with living in the suburbs? Or, is it human nature that young people seem to have no ambition beyond talking on their mobile phones, spending hours texting their friends or partying themselves into oblivion?

The funny thing is that I don't remember the people that I hung around in my late teens/early twenties with being like that. I didn't really drink that much, if any at that time and when I went out clubbing, it was to dance and not to party. The important thing was to express ourselves creatively and we always dressed for the occasion when we did.

This post is not to complain or even sound like my parents did when they are the age that I am now. I simply want to understand what is happening to the world and if the results of today's society are negative upon the planet and humanity, what I should be doing to ensure that won't happen. It really is the responsibility of this generation to take care of our home (the earth) and our family (humanity). There are times that I need a reality check to see if I am fulfilling that responsibility.

I have posted about this before, but I often lament the death of flirtation. On the weekend, I was talking with a friend about the disappearance of the ability to flirt in today's society. All of our emailing and text-messaging lacks the subtle nuances of this kind of communication and makes it easier to tell untruths or to give someone bad - or what we consider honest - news because we don't have to look them in the eyes. We don't have to break-up with our love interests in person any more because we can text it to them without having to experience the heartbreak on their end. In our world of hyper-technology, along with our penchant for all that is politically correct, we have forgotten how to truly communicate.

Does that make you as sad as I am about this?

Don't get me wrong. I am by no means a luddite but I feel like technology is "improving" so quickly that the human creatures that we are, don't have time to catch up with this ever-changing world on both an emotional and intellectual level. We are not animatrons that can instantly adapt to change. Humanity needs time to reach the levels of "maturity" to deal with the changes.

I wonder if this is why the young people that I encounter on a daily basis seem so lost. Sure they are young and adapt but it seems that no matter how hard they try to keep up, they are always behind on the newest technology. It's a situation in which we just give up because no matter how hard you try to stay ahead, you are always behind. Why try or aspire to something when it doesn't really get you ahead anyway?

Back in the days of my youth, we felt like we held the world by the tail. Creatively and personally, many believed that they simply needed the desire to express ourselves and we did. If we were inspired, we simply needed to act on it. I just don't see that nowadays. Maybe, as I mentioned before, I live in the suburbs and that is part of it. However, I don't think so. I just see ugliness. And, loss.

No wonder I turn to nature because nothing, not even the increasingly violent storms we've been having, seems to be ugly when it comes to this amazing force.. Nature has the power and the absolute beauty to amaze me on an everyday basis. Like the beautiful red sunrise we had last week with the sun a huge flaming red ball and the pink lining the underside of the clouds.

Thinking about it now, perhaps the ugliness exists because we have such beauty in the world...

Sorry for the delay in blogging. I've been sick with a neverending cold and am only starting to feel better... In absence of a real post, I thought that I would post the horoscope predictions for 2007 for my sign.

Leo

Leo luck for 2007
This year your Leo luck promises the most fun and pleasure of all 12 signs. Factoid. For the first time in over a decade, your creative talents will take off. This is because you finally have the courage to be yourself without fear or apology. “I yam what I yam.” Love and romance are off the charts. Ooh la la! New love will blossom (possibly with someone from a radically different background or another country); while existing relationships get steamy again! You’ll take a vacation. Because you’re comfortable in your own skin now, you're ready for a truly authentic relationship with someone. Where luck smiles: romance, vacations, the arts, children and sports.

2007:Winter & spring
As 2007 begins, you're enjoying romance, vacations and having a good time. Nevertheless, you’re still in work mode. In February, you’re giving it your all. But February is also a time when relationships start to assume top billing. Caution: conflict is possible then. Don’t over react. Anger serves no purpose except to make everyone miserable. By March, you’re focusing on jointly held property and possessions. But when sunny April starts to rain, you want to get outta Dodge. You need to blow town. That’s the perfect time to travel or go back to school or do anything that expands your horizons. Publishing, the media, medicine and the law get a nice boost then, too.

Dog days of summer
Ah, the warm weather brings the best out in your. In May & June, everyone notices you. Your success is obvious. Relations with parents and bosses become more significant. Your ambition is strong in July, nevertheless, all your work makes you want to hide somewhere. By August, you bounce back in grand style! People and opportunities swarm all around you. This is the time to wear bright colours and strut your stuff. A sticky situation with a friend in August will require tact and diplomacy. Be nice. Twain said, “I can live for two month on a good compliment.

Fall & winter
That back-to-school feeling in September always makes you pull up your sox and get cracking. Plus you need the dough because you’re the last of the big time spenders. No worries – you’re smart about generating cash. October is hustle time! Places to go, people to see, things to do. But by November, you want to hunker down in front of the fire. You’re working behind the scenes and possibly having a secret love affair. By December, you emerge with a holly wreath in on hand and a dirty martini in the other. “Chaste makes waste!!”

Obstacle blessings
Obstacle blessings are tough but valuable learning curves. About 14 years ago, things were tough; but you made new beginnings. You saw what was working and what wasn’t. You had lots of responsibilities and hard work. When we fast forward to 2005, we see that it’s been tough since then as well. In the last few years, circumstance have confined and restricted you. In addition, you felt cut off and lonely. Good news! This planetary squeeze play for two and a half years is gone by September. By then, you’ll know who you really are. Your next lesson is to learn what you really value. It’s a whole new world!

Some notes (not related to the horoscope):

Robert: Thank you SO MUCH for the lovely CD. I am listening to it in the office as I type. It's relaxing and wonderfully mellow - which goes with my day (and stuffed up head). How can one repay such thoughtfulness? I'll have to think long & hard on that one...

Welcome back MS, SE, SM and all of you others that have returned to our fair province after the holidays.

T, I hope your step-dad is fine and that your cold is soon over.

Kitti, thanks so much for the card! I got it this week. While I don't usually send cards for Christmas, yours was much appreciated. I hope that 2007 goes your way. (Tell Viktor that I said hello and happy new year)

Trisch, it's been great conversing with you by email. Take care and we'll talk soon.

Meeg, thanks for the e-card. I really appreciate you thinking about me during the holidays. Can't wait 'til you get here!

Mao! Thanks so much for the calls & encouragement during a time when we are both not well. I'm feeling way better today. Sleep actually helps... who would have thought?

Ms. Y. S. Kim. It's been a while. I hope that things are good and that you made it home safely.

Dave & Sian! I am composing a letter to you and will send it once it's finished. I trust all is well with you!

Mako-chan, sorry I didn't get a chance to talk with you before you left but I've been pretty sick. Got your message and, yes, lets keep in touch better than we have.

I know that there are loads of people that I am forgetting but I promise to email or write to you soon.

And everyone else out there? I wish you all the best for this year. Take care and I will post again soon.